Greetings from Fuerteventura

Greetings from Fuerteventura, south of Lanzarote, favoured Island of our president-elect, Bertie The Blameless. Or is that Bertie The Bollocks? We’ve been coming here for many years – our first visit being as far back as 1996 when most of the holidaymakers were Germans, with hardly a Brit or a Paddy to be found.

It was better then, if you ask me. As long as you were not in the market for a poolside sun lounger, that is. That first time, we were staying in an apartment near the pool of the complex, and derived considerable amusement from watching German couples sneaking down to the pool, late at night, to get their towels in place for Morgen. That Carling ad was not far off the mark, I tell you. We toyed with the idea of sneaking down ourselves and throwing the lot into the pool, but we never did.

Once, when we were in Jandia at the very south of the island, we saw a rock-built wind shelter (there are lots of them over the island, as Fuerteventura means “strong winds”) with the legend “besetzt bis 28. Mai” (occupied until 28th of May). Mad. Even a German guide book we bought at the time berated the idea. That said, at least there were plenty of opportunities to practice a bit of Deutsch, if you so desired, and we did it quite a bit.

As I say, it was better then as long as you had no territorial ambitions. Now it is all bulging Arnotts, Celtic, Rangers, and Man U jerseys. Sometimes it feels like Birmingham or, worse, Finglas in the sun. And what is it about the Irish and their aversion to condoms? Bloody hell, the number of Oisins and Roisins running rampant around the place we are staying is mind boggling.

They say we will all have to work until we are 90 because of the aging population, but I just can’t see that in an Irish context. Maybe we’ll have to work into our dotage just to pay the children’s allowances?

There was a famous quote from Groucho Marx, as he was presenting a programme many years back. The comic was interviewing a woman who had ten or eleven kids who said, presumably by way of explanation: “I love my husband”. Groucho replied: “I love my cigar too, but I take it out once in a while”.

Classic.

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Whoever thought rally driving could be so funny?

Amusing weekend post.

I came across this one on the web the other day, and wondered what Uncle Gaybo and the RSA would say about it.   "Dear oh dear oh dear", probably.  "If a squirrel had run out on that road". 

The only experience I had of watching a rally was at a mate's house in Galway, when we were marooned there as one was talking place around us.  Sadly, we had no option other than to drink cans of beer in the garden and watch the cars buzz by.  It was quite enjoyable, actually.

But look at this video, where the driver of a Subaru Impreza WRX (I think) has his progress repeatedly impeded by older, slower, two-wheel drive cars.  As far as I know, circuits are usually timed, so it seems odd that the cars' starting times were not spead out a bit more. 

Whatever the cause, the driver's frustration is palpable.  I particularly love the "Oh look at him slowin' down.  Fuckin' straight road!!!". 

Mrs Gombeen says the soundtrack is somewhat reminiscent of our last drive to Tescos, with yours truly at the wheel. 

She's such a wag.



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Man dances on Haughey's grave.

A 1994 Lotto jackpot winner, Vincent Keaney,  has posted footage of himself dancing on the grave of one of Ireland's best known corrupt politicans, Charlie Haughey.  He dedicated it to all of the Irish people "who hate the fucker", but presumably not to all of the fuckers who voted for Haughey - time and time again - during his overlong and corrupt lifetime. 

So is dancing on Haughey's grave an effective form of protest?  Whatever about that, it seems to have created a bit of a stir anyway, at least on Joe Duffy's Liveline programme.  As I work for a living, I didn't hear all the fuss when shocked layabouts phoned up Joe to express their disgust at the Boss's final plot being utilised in such a fashion.  I've no strong feelings on it one way or the other, aside from the fact that anything that causes indignation in Liveline listeners can't be such a bad thing. 

Haughey, though, wasn't the first slippery chancer and opportunist to defile our rotten little republic  -  that's a grand tradition that goes back to Dev.   And we all know that Haughey won't be the last, with plenty of them still stalking terra firma, rather than reposing below it.

If Keaney hangs around long enough, he'll be a busier man than Michael Flately.

Dancing on Haughey's grave.
It goes on a bit, but you get the idea:



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Tony Blair Easons protest - "war" criminals on both sides of the barriers

Like the Citizen in Joyce's well-named Cyclops episode, extreme cultural nationalists have an inherently narrow field of vision.  By extension, their ability to see their own hypocrisy must be similarly compromised.

While I had no problem with people protesting at Tory Blur’s Easons booksigning, on account of his invasion of Iraq and all the civilian deaths and chaos his actions caused, I did find it ironic to see the 32 County Sovereignty Movement were among the demonstrators.


The 32 CSM, remember,  is the political wing of the Real IRA – the unreconstructed lumpen “republicans” who brought us the Omagh bombing, the atrocity that killed 29 innocent people going about their business in the town 12 years ago.

Despite their obsolete Marxist rhetoric, these people - and others on the on the so-called republican “left” - are as much about progressive politics and "freedom" as any far-right ultra nationalist grouping, and should be seen as such.

The only Real difference is that they are a lot more deadly and given to participating in wanton slaughter on a grand scale.

Just like Tony Blair.

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Railing against bad spelling

We’ve already got extra points for doing Leaving Cert exams through Gaelic, and now our wise rulers are talking about bonus points for maths. Maybe they should also consider bonus points for English?


The picture (left) shows an advert spotted on the train earlier today, presumably dreamt up by some marketing whiz – at considerable cost – in an advertising agency. There are a total of 11 words in the ad, yet they’ve managed to spell one of them incorrectly: “Landsdowne” instead of “Lansdowne”.  

Now anyone can make a mistake, but you have to wonder how many pairs of orthographically-challenged red braces that one slipped past?

I hope Irish Rail got a discount for them. Or did they even notice?


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Nama, Versailles, Anglo, and Breathless Brian in denial.

First we have David McWilliams comparing the cost of the Nama bank/developer bail-out with Weimar Germany’s Treaty of Versailles war reparations:

“The Treaty of Versailles demanded that Germany pay €318bn in today’s money. From a German population at the time of 58 million, this equates to €5,482 per person in today’s money. If bank bailout costs are €50bn, then this will work out at €11,235 per head — or more than twice the cost per head of the Treaty of Versailles to the average German.”  (Indo Sept 1st)

Then we have the gladdening news that the taxpayer bail-out of corrupt bank Anglo Irish, which reported a record loss of €8.2 billion for the first half of this year, is the biggest bank bail-out in the world, ever!  So far, €23bn of our money has been poured down this financial plughole.  The first-half figure of €8.2 puts the millstone bank well on course for beating last year's record losses:

LOSSES posted by Anglo Irish Bank are the worst by any bank in the entire world, according to new data from a prestigious financial journal.
The taxpayer-owned bank's loss in 2009 of €15bn was far bigger than those of giant US, Japanese and German banks, according to 'The Banker', an industry magazine listing the 25 biggest losses.  (Indo Sept 2nd)
 
Then we have Brian Lenihan breathlessly telling us that the economy has stabilised because he and his idiot government have come marginally closer to matching their estimates of tax income in relation to government spending:

“Tax receipts fell by 9 per cent last month compared to a year ago, according to the latest Exchequer figures.
The State collected €18.9 billion in tax receipts in the first eight months of the year. This compares to €20.8 million collected in the same period last year, a drop of 9 per cent.

The €18.9 billion tax take is €141 million or 0.7 per cent below the Government’s target. However, this is an improvement on the comparable figure in July, when taxes were €247 million or 1.4 per cent below target.
The Exchequer deficit at end of August stood at €12.1 billion. This compares to an Exchequer deficit of €18.7 billion in August 2009.

The figures show that the budget is on target and economic growth is returning, Minister for Finance Brian Lenihan insisted tonight.”  (Irish Times Sept 2nd)


The truth is, unemployment is increasing and the Nama and Anglo bailouts are costing us, the taxpayers, more each day.  Never mind the reports of improved consumer confidence - these are the same idiots who were full of confidence buying  investor apartments off the plans a couple of years back - and never mind the improved GDP figures which are down to the multinationals.  This country is in deep trouble.

Worst of all, we have a government and a finance minister permanently wading in denial.

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Pace railway station - a godforsaken hellhole, if ever there was one.

It’s a desolate, godforsaken place, Pace Railway Station - a bit like Ireland in microcosm.  Pace is the country's biggest dedicated park and ride facility and one of the new stops on the Docklands to Dunboyne line, which opens next Friday.

Due to a lying estate agent, I found myself out that way last Saturday looking – out of curiosity - at a house that lay “a quarter of a mile away” from the new facility. The house itself looked lovely.  It even had an air of Chesire about it, and I half expected to see nutjob Roy Keane emerging with his Labrador from a nearby driveway. Thankfully he didn’t.

When they say this place is a “park and ride” they are not kidding. The only possible way you can get to it is by car or motorbike. Maybe a pushbike if you are intrepid/stupid enough to negotiate the massive roundabouts feeding on and off the new M3. And are you really going to cycle down the M3 on a pushbike?

If you live in one of the “nearby” settlements (see second paragraph) you will need a good pair of wellies, as in true Irish style, any footpaths that head off in the direction of the new station fizzle out and turn into brambles and muck before they actually reach it.   There is even a clever touch in the form of what looks like a pedestrian walkway to the station (just as the path stops) but, alas, it just goes down to a waterlogged bog of a field by the railway sidings.

If, though, you managed to negotiate the muck and the roundabouts on foot, you would be faced with a choice of scrambling down an embankment to get to the station proper, or walk another mile or so to the car park entrance and then double back to the station.

If you work in the IFSC your pinstripe is going to be in a right state by the time you get there.

Best take your car - but allow lots of time for the traffic jams.





Gombeen Nation Special Effects Department note:

If you want to get the full effect, get a cup of coffee, tea, whiskey or whatever, play the music below, and lose yourself in the picture above.



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Take Two (or Three) in Carton House, Maynooth.

Remember during the housing boom-mirage, the Irish Times property people did a "Take Five for €xxxxxx" feature?  It might still be running for all I know, but they usually picked out 5 properties, one in Ireland and the others abroad, for a given amount of money.

So, just supposing the figure was €700,000, the Irish offering was a bog-standard, three-bed semi-D in Dundrum, and the foreign equivalents were normally a rambling chateau in France, a mountain-top Schloss in Germany, a crib-style pad with swimming pool and quadruple garage in Florida, and half an apartment block in Budapest.

Most readers will know I often drive to Maynooth for my beer and other less essential foodstuffs, and the odd time I might stop off at Carton House for a ramble around the demesne.   Sometimes I wear very dark glasses to protect my eyes from the garish Argyle jumpers of the golfers as I pass the course there.  I don't want my good walk spoiled.

There are some lovely houses there too, and if you were self-employed - a drug-dealer for instance - it would be an idyllic place to live.  For wage slaves like most of us, though, it would be out of bounds as the hike out of the grounds and the further trek into Maynooth for public transport would be too arduous.  Then there is the price.

But just supposing you found yourself a lucrative sideline based around mainlining - or you won the Lotto -  you might be presented with a dilemma in choosing between the two properties featured in Gombeen Nation's very own Take Two in Carton House.

The asking price for one is €1,010,000.  It boasts four bedrooms and measures 1,897 square feet, according to MyHome.  The other four-bedroom house has a tag of €735,000 and measures 2,700 square feet, with 400 of those in the basement.  The smaller one looks bigger in the pictures, but I assume that is due to the design being over three levels rather than two.

I suppose it depends on how important a condescending, bird's-eye view of the golfing hoi polloi from your bedroom window is for you?  Or maybe you want to see the police coming earlier and have more time to flush your stash down one of the toilets?

Then again, you could make it a Take Three and simply go for yet another one that is identical to the "cheaper" offering above, with an asking price of €1,775,000 - over one million more!.

I assume the decor must be considerably better.  Or the vendors don't have a calendar.

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Commercial vehicle clampdown in Ireland - no escape from Vehicle Rip-off Tax.

There has been much in the news  recently on the Government’s suspected intentions to “clamp down” on people who use commercial vehicles for private and social purposes.

It seems that buyers of such machines may, in future, be required not only to sign a declaration at the local police station that they will use their vehicles for commerical purposes only, but will have to produce a “Revenue registration identity number” to prove their business credentials.  My oh my.  If only our Government was as stringent on all matters tax-related, as J.P. McManus, Dermot Desmond, Bono and the rest could testify.

And why is this, you may ask?   Well, it is because our Government continues to make Irish-based motorists pay more for their vehicles than residents of most other EU states through the continuing application of excise duty, or VRT (Vehicle Registration Tax).

Here is an example of why some people here choose to buy cars with the back seats and windows taken out, in order to lessen the effects of the Irish Government’s anti-EU tax, which is contrary to the spirit of free movement of goods within the European Union.  For the anti-SUVers, I'd add that I've even seen Volkswagen Golfs in Ireland that have undergone the "van" treatment:

Nissan X-Trail, 2-litre diesel, 150 bhp, passenger car.
Price: €40,535. Road tax: €1,050.

Nissan X-Trail, 2-litre diesel, 150 bhp, commercial “van”.
Price: €25,790. Road tax: €288.


And would you blame them? Or should they gladly hand over an extra €14,745 – plus an additional €762 in annual road tax - for our imbecile Government to pump into Anglo Irish Bank, Nama, and all the rest?

In the extensive coverage of this matter the obvious point has not been raised.  Namely, it should not be why commercial vehicles are cheaper in Ireland than private ones.  It should be why Irish residents must pay up to 40% more for their private cars than residents of other EU states.

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Note: Lots more on this on the blog.  Just tap "VRT" into the search box at the very top-left of the page..

Hansfield: the Dublin-Dunboyne station that isn't.

Look at the picture above.  It is from Manor Park Homes’ glossy brochure for the Barnwell, Hansfield, housing development in Ongar, north-west Dublin.  You will notice they boast about a rail service offering a peak-time frequency of every 15 minutes?

All well and good, you might think.  However, assuming such a service does transpire on September 2nd (Irish Rail’s promised introduction of the Docklands-Dunboyne rail link) if you live in Hansfield you will have to be content with watching the shiny new trains whizz past, as they will not be stopping at the newly built station.

Why? Well, it seems Manor Park Homes and Menolly Homes have not provided a planned access road to Hansfield Station, meaning the trains will pass through like it is not there.

First we have ghost estates, now ghost train stations.

We’ve more ghosts than a Doris Stokes séance.

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Louis Walsh has a pop at RTE

I don’t know much about Louis Walsh, other than the facts that he is responsible for Boylife or Westzone, and hosts a programme called Britain’s Got X-Factor.

But anyone – all of us, that is –compelled to pay a licence fee to keep the broadcasting apparatus of Official Ireland, RTE, in existence might well concur with the doyen of dubious light entertainment’s views on the ministry for public enlightenment that is Montrose.

Ken Sweeney, the Indo’s entertainment reporter, quoted Walsh as saying that:

“RTE need new faces and new attitude. They launched the new schedule and it was the same old faces, who I’m fed up looking at. RTE is the civil service. It’s a big building with all these people doing nothing. RTE should be sold off and the people running it sacked….


How are TV3 so successful when they have a smaller budget and only one little studio? They call RTE ‘the station of the cross’. God know’s it’s true. We have all been suffering for years. It has to end soon. Please.”

Agreed. There is something more than vaguely disconcerting, in my view, about the whole concept of a State broadcaster. Wochenschau did not have the benefit of being beamed into people’s living rooms but even then Dr Goebbels saw the mind-shaping potential of public broadcasting. OK, that is an extreme example, but you get the idea.

Be it Pravda, Der Stürmer, or RTE (yes, I’m being extreme again) you can’t expect Government-controlled media to be impartial to political influence. Never mind the fact that RTE enjoys an unfair advantage over TV3 by taking in advertising revenue and a TV licence fee, unlike the BBC.

It can’t be a good thing for the media to be controlled by the likes of Murdoch and O’Reilly either, but some kind of monopoly legislation should be capable of preventing this.

In which case, RTE should be kicked off the stage.

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Daft property reports and McWilliams herald further falls. And what about the earnings multiples?

We shouldn’t be surprised by recent reports from property website Daft that confirm house prices remain in decline and rents continue their downward slide. One of the reasons lending got so out of hand was the banks were handing out unsustainable multiples of people’s earnings, pre-crash.

There is little doubt that when they lend at all in the foreseeable future, they will be constrained by the strict application of the multiples formula when calculating affordability.  So, let’s say that they now apply 3.5 x times earnings for the primary income and 1 x one the secondary income (a generous multiple) for a couple who are both in full-time, permanent employment, that could work out as follows:

Income one: Average public sector earnings of €50,000
Income two: Average private sector earnings of €38,000*

= The maximum they can borrow is €213,000.

Even if one was on €80,000 and the other on €60,000 (and I don’t know any such couple pulling in that between them, but maybe that's the company I keep) the maximum amount would be €340,000.
Obviously, single people or couples with one earner could borrow correspondingly less.

I invite you to take a look at My Home or Daft, where you will still see asking prices of €750,000 for detached houses in established parts of Dublin 15 (just an example, as it's my own backyard), and see if asking prices tally up with those figures.

Then take David McWilliams piece in the Indo yesterday, where he predicts further price falls based on the following investor model:

"With government bonds yielding more than 5pc, it's fair to suggest that an investor would need to get a yield of at least 7pc from housing. So taking the average house price at €220,000 and the average rent at €863 per month, we see that the investor gets -- with these prices and these rents -- a gross yield of just over 4pc. This is before he takes into account his funding costs. Why would he bother getting into the market just yet?
In order to make a 7pc yield at the present average rent, the average price of houses would have to fall to €135,620. This suggests a huge further drop in average house prices here."

By either criteria, Tom Parlon’s famous bottom looks very far away at the moment.

Mercifully.

*both figures sourced from Ronan Lyons, Feb 2009.

Nama Zombie hotels to drive legitimate concerns out of business

One of the best descriptions of Nama I came across was on the blogosphere, namely Bock. He described the government / banker / developer scam thus:

“Whatever they tell you about haircuts, remember that Nama will still be paying the banks more than their loans are worth, through a deft piece of doublethink known as Long-Term Economic Value.

This means that Nama doesn’t buy the assets from the banks at their current value, but at some price which they hope will emerge perhaps ten years from now. It’s like buying an Ikea table and waiting for it to become an antique.”

Excellent.

But it seems that the Irish builder/developer class, their banking payrollers and, by extension, Fianna Fail just cannot see the connection between their cronyism and the country’s subsequent headlong plunge into crisis.

It has been remarked before on the blog how people who badged themselves free-marketeers – clowns like Charlie McCreevy – consistently used State intervention in the form of so-called “stimulus” policies to interfere in the residential and commercial property markets.  Even when the market was overheated Fianna Fail kept these policies going in a bid to keep the billions flowing into their builder buddies' bank accounts. It was like injecting crack/cocaine into someone suffering from an epileptic fit.

They did the same in the hotel industry with their tax breaks, and now many of these hotels that came into being on the back of such largesse are being taken over by Nama, effectively becoming “zombie” operations that, despite unsustainable borrowings and debt levels, have been allowed to stay open and operate at below cost price.

The result? Viable businesses will go bust as they can’t compete against such artificial, unfair competition. The Irish Hotels Federation expects 80-90 long-established, legitimate hotels to go into receivership this autumn.

What are the "free-marketeers" saying now?

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Tescos Maynooth Stella Artois scandal.

Frivolous Sunday post alert.

What the hell is going on? In any other country the indignant masses would be out on the streets storming the place, but not here.

Despite assurances that prices have dropped 14% in the past year, and despite the fact that the Government has reduced VAT on alcohol, Tescos has seen fit to increase its price for a crate of Stella Artois by 33%.

How can a major supermarket chain justify this increase on such an essential foodstuff, when real costs have actually fallen?   Sounds like blatant profiteering.  Then there’s the fact that Tescos Maynooth petrol and diesel prices are actually higher than the local pump here in Blanch.

What’s that about economies of scale and all the rest?

Maybe it's time for a Lidl diversion.

Rapist Larry Murphy released today.

A young woman was abducted from a Carlow car park by 36 year-old Larry Murphy in February 2000. He punched her and forced her into the boot of his car before driving to a dirt road nine miles away where he raped her.

Murphy then forced the woman back into the boot of the car and drove to an even more isolated spot in the Wicklow Mountains where he again raped her, and was in the process of strangling her when two men hunting foxes arrived on the scene. The rapist fled and the young woman escaped with her life.  Murphy later told gardai "she was lucky".

Murphy was only apprehended because one of the huntsmen recognised him.  He was subsequently found guilty of rape and attempted murder. The woman was too traumatised by her ordeal to even give evidence in court. Murphy’s sentence was 15 years.

That was back in 2001, and Larry Murphy walks free from Arbour Hill prison today, having attained early release for "good behaviour".

During his time in custody, the rapist/attempted murderer refused to take part in any rehabilitation programmes. As a result, there is intense media and public interest around the subject of his early release back into society, and not unreasonable fears that he still poses a danger to women.

Murphy was convicted before the Sex Offenders’ Act of 2001 came into force, so he cannot be made subject to any form of compulsory supervision by the State and any community into which he moves will not officially be made aware of his past.

While this site is hardly a “hang-'em, flog-'em” one, the question has to be asked as to how the perpetrator of such a vile crime can be released back into society without having undergone any kind of rehabilitation?

There is a danger – given the high profile and nature of the case – that when the law is seen to be an ass, some might seek their own kind of justice.

This is in nobody’s interest. Certainly not Larry Murphy’s.

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Social welfare fraud, public-office fraud, and tax evasion. The differing Irish attitudes towards each.

An article in last weekend’s Sunday Times offered food for thought on the authorities’ contrasting attitudes towards social welfare fraud and tax evasion, and the resources dedicated to tackle the respective abuses.

It seems that measures introduced in 2005, giving the State powers to data-match information held on individuals, have resulted in €484 million in welfare savings for the exchequer. The operation is run by 600 civil servants who monitor information on births, deaths and marriages from the General Register Office. I imagine such practices have been standard in other countries for decades.  What is more interesting, however, is the following.

In the last 10 years, according to the same feature, there were 3,183 prosecutions for social welfare fraud in Ireland, resulting in 48 people being jailed for 12 years and fines of €43 million being imposed.   In the same period, only 39 prosecutions for tax evasion resulted in a clawback for the State of €2,250,000 million. 

That is: 3,183 prosecutions = €43 million, against 39 prosecutions = €2.25 billion.   Surprisingly, only 6 tax fraudsters were jailed. 

Then again, given the nature of our rotten little republic it is not surprising at all, is it?  Given that tax “avoidance” by the very wealthy is lauded by much of the general public, who rush to pay homage to the likes of Bono, J.P. McManus, Denis O’Brien, and all the rest of them.  “Ah sure he gives a lot to charity, isn’t he great?”  is the mindset of these ragged-trousered, knuckle-headed, philanthropists.   Evasion is only the next, illegal, step.

And then we have Official Ireland agonising over whether corrupt politicians, who painstakingly plundered the public purse through fraudulent expenses claims, should be prosecuted – or even barred from public office.

We are a nation of no-hopers, and that is the truth. We need to be invaded again.

And this time the  “oppressors” should not leave until the civilisation process is complete.

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Irishman, Michael Keogh, saved Hitler's life.

Thanks to F for sending in the following clip from the Belfast Telegraph, concerning an Irishman who did the world the disservice of saving Hitler's life.

The long-lost memoirs of an Irish soldier who saved a young Adolf Hitler and fought on both sides during World War I have been published after being missing for over 40 years.

The amazing wartime tale of Dubliner Michael Keogh began when he joined the British Army in 1914 and won the George's Cross for bravery before being captured by the Germans in 1916.


While in captivity he was persuaded by members of the Roger Casement Brigade, a group formed to recruit Irish soldiers to fight against the British as a display of Irish republicanism, to join them.   The detailed accounts of Mr Keogh's life, written after his experiences, mysteriously disappeared while he was on his deathbed in James Connolly Memorial Hospital in Blanchardstown in 1964.


According to his son Kevin (84), who lives in Swords, north Co Dublin, a man "dressed as a priest" took them from under his pillow two days before he died. The files were eventually found in the UCD archives and given back to the family in 2004.  The memoirs report a chance encounter with a young Adolf Hitler that changed the course of history.

Shortly after the Great War, while Mr Keogh was staying in Munich to fight against the Communist rulers who had declared a short-lived Bavarian Soviet Republic in April 1919, he recalls how he led a military operation to save the life of the future German tyrant.  He had earlier met Hitler in September 1918 near Ligny on the French Border, where the pair were in the same Bavarian Regiment.

In his memoirs he describes how, as the officer on duty during the anti-Communist revolution, he received an urgent call about a riot involving 200 men and two "political agents", one of them being Hitler, in a nearby gym.

"I ordered out a sergeant and six men and, with fixed bayonets, led them off on the double."

Mr Keogh explained that two political agents, who had been lecturing from a table top, had been dragged to the floor and were being beaten.

"The two on the floor were in danger of being kicked to death. I ordered the guard to fire one round over the heads of the rioters. It stopped the commotion."  The group of soldiers managed to haul out the two injured politicians.... "The fellow with the moustache gave his name promptly: 'Adolf Hitler'.  They had come to the barracks as political agents for the new National Socialist German Workers' Party."

Keogh, who died in 1964, went on to become a founding member of the Roger Casement Repatriation Committee and a leading figure at ceremonies in Casement's honour.

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Noel Dempsey takes Government jet to Donegal MacGill conference.

You might think with the ongoing Callely revelations, burgeoning dole queues, and a growing budget deficit, that our politicians would make some effort to at least be seen to moderate their innate piss-taking propensities.  Not so.

Transport minister Noel Dempsey is the latest to hog the spotlight for wasting public money and racking up needless expense.  He took the government Gulfstream IV jet on a short hop to give a speech last July at the MacGill Summer School – a pointless talking shop that takes place each year to “debate issues of national importance”.  The jet costs €7,890 an hour and is capable of flying across the Atlantic, according to a report in the Indo.

As if that was not bad enough, his Garda driver travelled the 274KM from Dublin to pick him up at Derry Airport, before chauffeuring him the remaining 94km to Glenties, Donegal, where MacGill is held.

And what was the topic of discussion at the conference?

"Reforming the republic—issues of politics, economics and accountability".

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If you're drivin', come into the parlour. Car crashes into Clare house - again.

Monday’s papers reported the case of an elderly man in Clare who was lucky to escape death when a car crashed through his front wall and into his house the previous day.

Incredibly, it is not the first time 80-year-old Martin McGuane has had such an experience – this was the seventh time a motorist gatecrashed his home.

The situation has become so perilous that the retired farmer shuns using his front door and opts to use the back one instead.  It seems there have been at least 20 accidents on the road outside his dwelling and he has asked the council to erect safety barriers, but to no avail.

Indeed, according to McGuane the local council insists he must build his own barriers, due to “liability issues” - an option he refuses to take as he “would then be liable if someone hit it and was hurt”.   Road safety, Irish style.

So, let's see. We have an 80-year-old man afraid to sit in his living room for fear of being mown down by an errant driver because:

1) The council can't be bothered to put up safety barriers on an obviously dangerous section of road.

2) The elderly house occupant is afraid of being sued.

Only in...?

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Water skiing (or wakeboarding) the canal in Tullamore.

I had never heard of wakeboarding until someone sent me this You Tube clip. Apparently, according to Wikipedia, it is:

“a surface water sport which involves riding a wakeboard over the surface of a body of water. It was developed from a combination of water skiing, snow boarding and surfing techniques.

The rider is usually towed behind a motorboat; typically at speeds of 18–24 miles per hour depending on the water conditions, board size, rider's weight, and rider's comfort speed. But wakeboarding can also be performed with a variety of media including closed-course cables, winches, PWCs, and ATVs.”

Unless you live in Ireland, of course, where you simply find a nearby canal, hitch a rope onto the back of a friend’s car, and off you go.  It must be something to do with the (unofficial) recession, where inflatable banana rides off the Torremolinos coast and the like are not as attainable as they were in the past.  At least it is some kind of indication of a “can-do” spirit, I suppose.

I love the dialogue at the start of the video. “It won’t start off in second gear!!!”.

Erm, how about putting it into first?



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