Friday 25 December 2009

Keep your Christmas Happy... stay away from the Forty Foot

Look at the picture on the left, taken at the Forty-Foot near Sandycove – presumably last year. The Forty Foot Swim is a tradition with some elements of south Dublin on Christmas Day, who congregate at the location to submerge themselves in the freezing drink. It’s something to do with masochism or penance, I think... if you want to make a distinction between the two.

I've been pondering this for some time, and honestly can’t think of a worse thing to do. For my part, I’ll be submerging a few drinks today, but rest assured I won’t be anywhere near the Forty Foot… not even to look and give encouragement to the eejits.

No, things will be a lot more sedate and sensible in the Manor. A bucks fizz breakfast, for instance. Then a search of the TV listings to see if Chitty Bang Bang is on. Maybe a can or two of Newry lager, then a Bernard Matthews synthetic turkey dinner, washed down with bucks fizz and maybe a Guinness just to be patriotic, and a few bags of Tayto for good measure. You get the idea. OK, not very sensible at all - but what other day can you do all this on?

Anyway, it certainly beats splashing around in the Forty Foot, your skin roaring red raw from the bitter cold, doesn’t it?

Happy Christmas.


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6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Happy Chistmas GM. Couldn't find Chitty Chitty Bang Bang... Jesus, what's happened to Christmas TV, they don't even show Oliver these days!

Contented myself with The John Kelly Ensemble on Lyric FM - I must look up the playlist on RTE's site, he had some gems, including a '30's sounding jazzy number sung by a black bloke singing about Santa being a toker, " high on a 100 foot long reefer". He's so high apparently, that he's "way, way up in sky". Gas.

Happy Christmas.

The Gombeen Man said...

Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

Have a good one.

Harald75 said...

Freezing when I even look at these pics ...

Mele Kalikimaka to you, GM :)

The Gombeen Man said...

You too H. And a happy new year and all that.

Anonymous said...

"The Kerrimen"

I have been in conversation with two very genial Irishmen whilst waiting for a Eurostar train. These gentlemen told me of a remote tribe in the south west of Ireland called “The Kerrimen“. It seems that these people have not changed at all since the time of the Vikings of which they are true descendants.

Mr John Malone from Clare told me that these people live high up in the Kerry Mountains and only come down about twice every year. He said that they act like marauders and steal livestock and women that they bring back to their mountain strongholds. Because of centuries of interbreeding these people have unusual characteristics in that both the men and women have beards and their pubic hair reaches down to their knees, which is revolting.

It seems that for sexual purposes they make no distinction between men women and animals. I find this characteristic to be totally and utterly disgusting and unhygienic. They must be thoroughly unhealthy people and heaven knows what they must do to their children.

I am surprised that the Irish Government Health Department had Social Services has allowed this sort of sordid activity to continue for so long. I am most surprised that the catholic missioners have not attempted to convert them to Christianity or, have the missioners been eaten?

The gentlemen told me that when these men come down from the mountains, the local people abandon the town until they have gone away again. It seems that these mountain people steal the light bulbs and the water taps in the belief that these items will still operate without an electrical or water supply. How could anyone be so stupid?

I was brought up in Wadi Alfa on the Egyptian Sudan border and I have seen many primitive things and travelled to primitive places, but I have never heard of such a thing especially in Europe. I am an anthropology student and I would like to study these people in an ethnographical context, but if they as gruesome and unsavoury as I have been told, I would think twice about visiting them without a guide and protection.
Even the remote parts of Afghanistan and the highlands of Borneo are more sophisticated than this tribe.

I will write to the Anthropology Faculty at Trinity College Dublin after the holidays. I did ring “The Kerriman” Newspaper for information but they were most abrupt and impolite to me and they hung up the telephone on me as though I was talking nonsense. They did not believe my story.

I have contacted customerservice@dast.gov.ie I am deeply concerned that such primitive people like “The Kerrimen” should be allowed to continue their strange primitive undisciplined culture, Clearly, these people need help now. Why is something not being done about it?

Abdulla Hakim
Wadi Alfa, Sudan

The Gombeen Man said...

Erm... thanks for that one Abdulla. Not sure if you meant to post it here or in the Danny Foley one?