Wednesday, 2 December 2009

Virgin Mary, Knock, and eyesight damage

You'll all know by now that Gombeen Man is a great fan of religous visionary Joe Coleman, who regularly conducts conversations in his Ballyfermot living room with the Virgin Mary. Joe, of course, has predicted "Yer Wan" will appear again at Knock this coming Saturday, the 5th of December.

Needless to say, the cynics have been having a go once more. This time it's some big-shot eye surgeon fella who is putting the mockers on the great forthcoming miracle by claiming that the faithful are not - in fact - seeing the Virgin Mary, but are having the backs of their eyes burnt out by the Sun's rays.

Dr Eamonn O'Donoghue claims that staring at the Sun can cause you to see a "great variety of bizarre visual phenonema". The Galway University Hospital surgeon says he has already treated five Virgin Mary enthusiasts who followed our Joe's advice to hot-foot it down to Knock. This is ridiculous, of course! The man is talking rot as he obviously has no faith and his soul is clearly damned for all eternity for suggesting such nonsense! It will be more than his eyes burning in the fires of Hell, the bowsie!

The video below "appeared" on RTE tonight (in the form of a video) and gives the real facts of the matter through an interview with a female veteran of previous Knock miracles. After looking continually at the Sun for a while, she recounts how it started "dancing" before taking the "form of a host" in the sky. Once again, this is conclusive proof on Gombeen Nation that the clearly intelligent people standing in the mucky fields of Knock, gawping at the heavens, are indeed witnessing apparitions of "Our Lady", and are not blithering half-wits burning their eyes out.

Doctors eh? Who needs them?

TOO MUCH "VIRGIN MARY" IS BAD
FOR YOUR EYESIGHT
RTE video on sun damage to eyes at Knock

video

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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

WHAT AN AWSOME little country never a dull moment long time since i saw the word bowsie they dont grow over here CHEERS GM

The Gombeen Man said...

You're missing it all over there Mr BH. It's a fabulous little land, no doubt about it!

Anonymous said...

Ok GM I'm with you on this and I think it's time that we got behind the faithfully deluded (oops sorry - just slipped out)I'm putting out a challenge to all your readers to help come up with an Anthem for the faithful to sing out at the tops of their voices on their way to Knock on Sunday. Maybe something along the lines of the Scott McKenzie flower power one hit wonder of the sixties "If you're going to San Francisco". I've knocked together the first couple of lines - "If you're going to Knock this Sunday. Be sure to buy some Polaroid eyewear" Need help though with "...Eamon O Donoghue warn yez.......damage to yer corneas"
Good Luck from Ponyboy

The Gombeen Man said...

That's a good idea, PB. As are the polaroids.

Speaking of songs, how about we keep the religious fervour - sorry, flavour - and adapt the hymn "Amazing Grace" (no bagpipes though).

Instead of the line "was blind, but now can see" we could have "could see, but now am blind".

But maybe that's best for the journey back from Knock...

joe coleman said...

it saddens me when I see the disrespect shown not just to me (I can understand the skeptics they are going to ridicule me) but to Our Lady and God the almighty father. It might be great fun to post these blogs but did it ever dawn on you that what I am saying may just be true? You will believe in time. I suggest you keep an open mind and take the time to read the divine messages that have been given to not just Ireland but to the world in relation to the Second Coming of Jesus on the earth. It's going to happen. And it will happen soon. Joe Coleman www.knockapparitions.com

Anonymous said...

Joe,
I'm much grateful to you for answering those who mock the message of the Virgin Mary. As Christians, we all travel the long road. Those who mock and scorn just don't understand that when us traveller girls expose our mid-riffs at Knock, we are only answering the question we ask ourselves all the time: "What would Jesus do?".

Anonymous said...

this is a scam and blasfamy